KO#16: How to hold a conversation


Welcome to the 16th issue of the Knockout Your Sunday Scaries Newsletter, an every-other-week newsletter by me, Kristy Olinger, with a focus on workplace communication and self-development. I’m glad you’re here. Was this forwarded to you? Get yours: Subscribe here


Sunday, October 6th, 2024

Hi there,

A few years ago I won a contest at work alongside 9 of my peers. The prize was a trip to New York City and as part of that whirlwind day we got to have lunch with our CEO at the iconic Red Rooster in Harlem. Over our mac and greens the CEO asked us each to share what area of the bank we work in and what we are working on. After each person spoke, the CEO expanded the conversation by sharing some recent happenings in that area and a mini-dialogue ensued.

It was incredibly impressive. I was absolutely WOW-ed by it.

Then there was an awkward pause. You know the one that happens with people who don’t know each other and are a little nervous.

I was the one to break the ice to ask the CEO about how his memory works to enable that breadth of conversation off the cuff. Does he write things down? Then after that; is he more focused on company or market trends? Is there a group text with the Executive Committee? How much time does he spend reading? From there we had a full group conversation about our favorite business books.

Later that day, another executive who had been at the table complimented my conversation skills. She said I navigated the mixed audience well to keep the conversation going and help all to feel included.

The irony of this is that hadn’t been my intention. I’m just a generally curious person. Dale Carnegie famously said “To be interesting, be interested.” I’ve found that when I’m interested and curious, the conversation just flows easily.

The lesson: If a conversation gets awkward, you should get curious and ask questions.


📆 EVENT: The Opposite of Small Talk is coming to Cambridge MA Oct 19th <<GET TICKETS>>

  • See me paired off with past podcast guests on a conversation topic you choose

  • Some planned topics include: How to make friends as an adult, Is work broken?, Is it possible to be your ‘authentic self’ everywhere and what does that even mean?


Content Round Up - In Case You Missed It

Even if you’re following me on social media, the algorithm may or may not put my post in your feed. Here is what has launched over the last 2 weeks, in case you missed it.

Episode 160: Get Better Feedback - PODCAST

My last newsletter on this topic resonated and 81% of Instagram followers said that they don’t get helpful feedback regularly. Listen for ideas on how to get better feedback and what to specifically do when you get feedback that you disagree with.

Job Crafting - VIDEO

This video is a message about the value of sharing your interests and skills that have nothing to do with your day job with your work colleagues. You never know when there will be an opportunity to use those skills at work.


You made it to the end! Congrats & thanks. ❤️ Have a great two weeks.

Stay Curious,

Kristy

P.S. Come see me at this Live podcast event in Boston on Oct 19th!

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KO#17: No Such Thing as a “Natural”

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KO#15: Get Better Feedback