KO#2
Welcome to the 2nd issue of the Knockout Your Sunday Scaries Newsletter, an every-other-week newsletter by me, Kristy Olinger, with a focus on workplace communication and self-development. I’m glad you’re here. Was this forwarded to you? Get yours: Subscribe here
Sunday, January 28, 2024
Hi there,
As a corporate professional you need extra tricks up your sleeve to help you handle people and emotions. My best tricks are interesting ideas from behavioral science studies that can be applied to corporate life. Behavioral science is a term for a grouping of sciences including psychology, sociology, economics, and cognitive science. I’ve long been a student of behavioral science via podcast university. My favorite “teachers” have been Freakonomics, No Stupid Questions, Hidden Brain, Happier, and too many more to mention. Here are three ideas that have been useful in my work life.
Spontaneous Trait Transference: Communicators are perceived as possessing the very traits they describe in others.
It can feel so good to vent about a co-worker to another co-worker. But this finding should give you pause. When you describe others as lazy or ineffective, the person you’re talking to could unconsciously begin to think of you that way. It turns out the school yard chant was true - what you say bounces off others and sticks to you. So how can you use this to your advantage at work? Sincerely compliment others behind their back.
Mere-Exposure Effect: People have a preference for things and people that are familiar to them.
A factor that people don’t often consider is the effect of simply increasing interactions with people to influence them to be more supportive of you simply because you become more familiar to them. This phenomenon is why I still suggest it’s important to send a thank you note after an interview - it’s an extra opportunity for the hiring manager to interact with you. It’s also why I encourage people to turn their camera on… even in those really large meetings that make you feel like you’re on display. Just seeing your face makes you more familiar.
Spotlight Effect: People believe that they are being noticed more than they actually are.
This is an important finding that I share with my 1:1 clients who are nervous about speaking up in meetings. We think that all eyes are on us and that thought creates so much pressure that it amplifies our nerves and impacts the ability to communicate effectively. Instead, take comfort in the fact that people aren’t paying as close of attention as you think they are. They are unlikely to notice if your voice shook a bit or you stumbled on a word.
Do you have a behavioral science hack for work? Let’s hear it!
Hit reply and say ‘hi’ - wether you’re an OG subscriber or just stumbled across this, I would love to hear from you. What do YOU want from a newsletter like this? How can I help you banish your Sunday scaries? Let me know.
Content Round Up
Here are some of the things that have struck a chord with people over the last 2 weeks.
Give the Bottom Line Up Front - VIDEO
When people ask a direct question, there is nothing more frustrating than having to wade through detailed commentary to try to identify the answer. This video explains a concept that originated in the US Military called Bottom Line Up Front (BLUF) - which was introduced to be sure people were giving the most important information first. This video gives you example of what this sounds like. One commenter pointed out that this is a very United States based strategy and not how communication works in other cultures. Fair point. It’s why I always suggest that when you see an idea, you first consider your own context before trying it.
When You Get Too Many Emails After Hours - VIDEO
For some people, the pressure to be responsive makes getting emails at night and over the weekends very stressful. Establishing ‘working hours’ that are explicit can be a helpful way to avoid unnecessary stress and improve your ability to focus on your non-work life. This video even gives you a script for how to address it with your boss or others who email at all hours.
Introducing Yourself in a Meeting - VIDEO
Sometimes it’s the foundational things that trip us up the most. This simple video gives you the basics on what to include when you introduce yourself in a meeting and even includes an example of how I might introduce myself on a call.
What I’m Reading Glad We Met, by Steven Rogelberg
This book explores the science behind 1:1 meetings. While I’m finding some of the concepts basic, that’s probably because I’ve spent more time thinking about this topic than the average reader. The default training for how to have 1:1 meetings is to learn by watching what your boss did for you. Not a great model and as a result most are not taking full advantage of the 1:1 format. It’s a worthwhile read.
Miscellany: noun, a group or collection of different items; a mixture.
Name Pronunciation
“A person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” [Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People] But what happens when you don’t know how to pronounce someone’s name? Sure, you can ask them… but what if you already have and you can’t remember? One place to check is LinkedIn because there is a feature to add an audio clip in your profile of how to pronounce your name. If the person hasn’t done that, use a site like pronouncenames.com or howtopronounce.com.
Are Men talking too much? Find out here
You made it to the end! Congrats & thanks. ❤️ Have a great two weeks.
Stay Curious,
Kristy
P.S. If you want more communication strategies but you would rather listen than read, try this Spotify playlist of the workplace communication episodes of The Opposite of Small Talk. The most popular episode in this series is #121. How to Sound More Interesting (and Confident).
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